I know that it is at best flirting, but it is damn fun. Her mere presence makes my world a little brighter. I love it when she smiles. It fills me with something that is foreign in my line of work: hope. However, my cowardice and indecision drives her away. I want her to understand that my inaction is not based on my inability to be decisive, but that I do not want to do something stupid in front of her. Yet, I know that under stress that people are true to their nature, and I am not different. In her presence, I show that I am a clumsy moron embarrassing myself, and reveal that that I am nothing more than a drunken local. God, I am 37. I should not be acting as if I was 3+7. Nevertheless, I press on, even if I fail in this endeavor.


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